An “unfriendly” colleague has been criticized online for asking a new employee to move chairs in an “empty” staff room.
In a popular post on Mumsnet, user cheesecakeitalian explained that she started a new job on October 18 and that her new colleague’s behavior was confusing her.
She said that after her second day on the train, she smiled at a colleague and got a blank look back. She wrote: “She probably didn’t recognize me.”
In March 2022, a survey found that 31 percent of 1,902 employees in the US are annoyed by a co-worker several times a week. The Quality Logo Products research found that the most irritating workplace behaviors interrupt, take arrogance and take credit for someone else’s work.
The original poster went on to explain what happened on her third day at the new job, writing that she sat on a “huge u-shaped couch” in the teachers’ lounge before being approached by her colleague who was allegedly into her. 20’s.
“She came over with a bottle of tea and a sandwich and just said, ‘Oh, I’m sitting there.’ The room was almost empty, she could have literally sat on the same couch with one of the other tables or sat down at one of the many other tables in the room. I just got up and sat somewhere else,” she wrote.
The original poster added a comment that read, “I was going to say, ‘Sorry, is your name on it?’ [I] felt so ashamed and it was like being back at school.”
In the comments, the original poster mentions that her colleague is “gushy” when approached by the younger attractive male employees.
News week spoke with Donna Clark-Love, a bullying expert, who shared top tips on dealing with a “mean girl” in the workplace.
Clark-Love said: “What this new employee is dealing with is ‘mean girl’ behavior in the workplace. The silver lining is that while many of us inevitably encounter mean girls during our careers, how to manage them teaches us will make everyone stronger, more resilient and more confident.
Clark-Love, from Houston, Texas, told… News week on her top tips for dealing with “mean girl” behavior in the workplace:
- Take the Main Road – When it comes to mean girls, do your best to block out the negative noise they create. Don’t take what they say or do personally. Sometimes the most effective response you can give to a bully is no response at all. If they take the main road, they can retreat. And if you can’t respond calmly, just walk away.
- Understand that you have a choice – you can choose to ignore the behavior, or you can choose to address it by expressing your feelings with an “I” message such as “If you…; I feel… .; In the future I would for you to…”
- Let kindness and politeness be your motto – What I mean by this is to just be nice and polite to everyone. Be nice (but not overly nice or fake) to mean girls too.
- Brainstorm how to respond to future interactions – Look for ways to handle the problem with this person in a professional way, without lowering them to their level. So, for example, if you’re on the same team or volunteer together, can you find common ground to bring you closer together? If not, can you engage a third party as a sounding board/voice of reason? In all cases, document what happens so that you have an overview of the interactions in case you need it later.
- Don’t become a mean girl yourself – It’s human nature to want to take revenge and gossip about the mean girl(s) who are cruel to you, but it only makes the situation worse. This never works! And it’s not worth it.
- Find Your Group—If you’re being mistreated personally, especially as a new hire, it’s so important to meet people and surround yourself with people who support and support you.
The post received more than 150 responses from Mumsnet users. One user said, “Maybe you got the job she went for? And now she’s bitter? Anyway, she sounds awful. Good luck with your new job.”
“I think you just met a woman who is a bit stuck in her manners, every workplace has at least one such person. You will probably find that other people think she’s weird too. I’m sure there are plenty of other friendly people out there to talk to,” wrote another.
Newsweek was unable to verify the details of the case.
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